A 180 DEGREE TURN IS ONLY A MATTER OF 1.5

Ideas are just ideas WITHOUT COMMITMENT

Goals are simply goals WITHOUT ACTION

Dreams are just dreams WITHOUT EXECUTION

I’m down here in Bend, Oregon for a conference at the beautiful Sunriver Resort.  Its 90 degrees + all weekend.  They just got a new pool last year, there’s golf, trails, shops, and cool places to eat…one problem, my family is not with me.  So what do I do when I have free time, alone?…I read about or watch YouTube videos of inspiring people.  The old me, would probably go see a movie, dink around with my phone and all my social media apps, or binge on Netflix (with nobody to chill with…poor me).

For some reason, those things that I just listed do not fill me up like they used to.  Since I started this blog I have been researching almost obsessively what causes success…looking for habits, traits, and philosophies of ordinary people who do extraordinary things.

One common denominator of people who have extreme success is they do more with their time. 

I get it, after a long hard days work, putting out fires, grinding, commuting to and from work, dealing with people, you need time to decompress and disengage for a bit.  TV is a great outlet, spending time with our loved ones in my opinion is the best outlet, and many of us turn to our phones to escape from the rat race of life.  But for too many, this phone epidemic is getting a little out of hand (I haven’t even gotten into video games).  From games, to various apps, to emails and text messages, Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc.  There is a name for people who have a cell phone addiction…its called “nomophobia.”  People create a neurological addiction, where they cannot be separated from there phones, laptops, iPads, or tablets…similar to craving cigarettes or alcohol.

My challenge to you is to invest in yourself 1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week.  The weekends are all yours.  I promise you, no one ever looks back on their life and says, “I wish I would have played Candy Crush or World of Warcraft more,” or “My life would have been a whole lot better if I spent more time on Instagram.”  No one ever reflects and says, “If only I would have slept more, watched more TV, binged more shows on Netflix, or played more video games.”

Don’t be like this dude..get off the couch!

Here is how you can do a 180 degree turn that will set your goals and dreams in motion…it starts by carving out 1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week, which is 7.5 hours per week, 30 hours per month.  Try this for six months and you’ll have invested 180 hours (hence the 180 degree transformation) into yourself.

1. Look at all your social media apps 3 times per day and that’s it: morning, afternoon, and once at night.  That’s plenty of time to evaluate all your likes and commenting on post that make you smile.
2.  When you come home, engage with your loved ones with no distractions: No TV, put the phones away, and do like they did in the 1950’s, talk and check in with each other.
3. Limit your “shows” to no more than 2: There’s nothing wrong with having a go-to show or two, but 10 is a liiiiitle too much.
4. Focus 1.5 hours of your time doing something productive: After you’ve engaged with your family, ate dinner, put the kids down, checked your phone for a few minutes, invest in your development.
5. The world is your oyster: during this time, read a book, learn a new skill, get inspired, listen to a podcast, practice your craft, write, meditate, exercise, call and talk to a mentor, finally turn your idea into a small business…there are so many possibilities for self improvement!

Feel like you you don’t have enough time to get everything done?  Here’s a novel idea…wake up earlier!  Take care of the most critical things you need to get done first, so you free yourself up to do what you want.  Stop being like every one else who has a million excuses and isn’t happy with where they are in their life.  Take action!

As each day passes, its a lost opportunity to get better. Live with no regrets!

We only have a finite number of days on this earth.  Only God knows that number.  Maximize each day!  You and only you have the power to make daily decisions on how you spend your time…are you going to improve and get better or settle or get worse?

Make the decision today that you’ll wish you made 5, 10, 15 years from now.

So what area do you want to improve?  What new skill do you want to develop?  Turn your passion project into a reality.  Finally create your side project into a legit small business.  For you non entrepreneurs, learn to play the piano or guitar, improve your finances and knowledge in investing, write a book, or improve your fitness.  Like I said, the world is your oyster.  Commit to yourself 1.5 hours per day for 5 days a week for 6 months, and your life will take a 180 degree turn for the better.  Set a goal, create a plan, and get after it!!!  Breaking big things down into little chunks, makes what seems impossible, possible.

So how did I come up with 1.5 hours, 5 days a week for 6 months?  Here’s how: Scientific research shows it takes 66 days to form a habit…so that takes up the first 2 months, just forming a habit of making time to invest in yourself.  From there, you can further specialize or add multiple new skills to your repertoire.  Josh Kaufman, author, blogger, and motivational speaker, says you can actually learn a new skill in 20 hours…not the 10,000 hour rule suggested by best selling author Malcolm Gladwell. 

If you don’t invest in yourself, no one else will.  1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week, will allow you to do just that.  Go for it!  You will thank yourself in the future.

CORE VALUES

Your core values are the deeply held beliefs that authentically describe your soul. – John C. Maxwell

During a 2006 vacation to Argentina, entrepreneur Blake Mycoskie met a woman who worked with a volunteer organization that gave shoes to kids in need.  Mycoskie joined in the cause and visited village after village and saw first hand the sores, blisters, and infections not having shoes caused.  He was deeply effected.  He came back to American inspired with a vision.  Shortly thereafter the vision for Toms was created…The One For One business model was the core mission of his shoe company.  For every shoe they sell, Toms will give a shoe to someone in need.  This core value of service has made Mycoskie and Toms very successful and set the path for how he would operate his then small company, which has grown to millions and millions of dollars in sales.

Toms founder Blake Mycoskie

Core values are enduring beliefs or ideals that drive one’s behavior.  It tells us “what is and what is not good” in our actions.  These guiding principles influence how we make our choices, what choices we do make, and often times how we are judged in our actions by these choices.  Like Katy Perry says in the song Roar, “I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything.”  Don’t be that Katy.

What happens when an individual or company does not have sound core values?  Well, ask Lance Armstrong and former members of the leadership team at Enron how that went.  Without core values, clear ideals and guiding principles that aid us in our decision making, we are playing with fire.  Tiger Woods’ domination of the golf world came crashing down when it was reported that he had been living a double life filled with lies, cover-ups, and extra marital affairs.

Core values help us make the tough decisions.  I love the concept that with clear values, decisions are easy.  I wish it was that simple, but if we haven’t examined what we stand for, the type of person we want to be, and what is important to us, sometimes decisions are not easy.  By taking ownership of your values and defining your beliefs – what’s important to you – you are setting up a system that will guide you through the challenges life throws us.  

Think about people that you respect and have learned from…maybe they are your parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, family members, your pastor, or close friends.  What have you learned from them?  How do you want them to see you?  How do you want your children to see you?  Remember, most children do what you do, not what you say.  If you haven’t yet, it’s time to think about your core values and write them down.  Here are two articles to help you drill down your core values:

7 Steps to Discovering Your Core Values

Define Your Personal Core Values in 5 Steps

While speaking to a leadership class at Sumner High School, I shared my core values.  I came up with an acronym: GEARS.  In order to achieve our goals and final destination in this journey of life, its important – just like a car – to have the transmission (your belief system) in the right gear. 

Gratitude: in all things be grateful.

Effort &

Attitude: no matter what is happening around me, I can always control my effort and attitude

Right Thing: “R” stand for “Do the RIGHT thing.”  The definition of integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking.

Service: My goal is to leave a legacy of service…loving and helping others.

Carroll’s book: Win Forever is a must read

Pete Carroll’s first two stints as a head coach in the NFL didn’t go as well as he had hoped.  First with the New York Jets and later with the New England Patriots, both ending in him being fired.  After being let go from the Patriots organization, Pete went through something he had not experienced in his career…he had no job, but time, a lot of time.  This time away from the game forced him to re-evaluate his coaching philosophies.  While as a head coach in NY and NE, Pete felt he was not letting his true core beliefs and values shine through.  He conformed his approach to meet the old school expectations of leading the way NFL teams have always been lead: having no fun and coaching players out of fear, instead of uplifting them.

Inspired by legendary UCLA basketball coach John Wooden’s Pyramid of Success, Carroll wrote down his core values and coaching philosophy.  He promised himself, the next time he had the opportunity to be a head coach, he would run his program lead by these guiding principles.  The rest is history…he dominated the Pac-12 at USC and when no believed his style would work in the NFL, his approach has proven very successful and copied by many other coaches in the league and by coaches from other sports, including Steve Kerr from the record setting Golden State Warriors.

Take time, just like Carroll…dig deep and discover your core values.  Once you have come up with these pillars of believe that drive your behavior, write them down and tell someone and remember:

You can’t follow your dreams if you only follow others. 

My next topic in my series “Building Your Brand” will focus on identifying your strengths.  Enjoy the holiday weekend!!!

PS: Interested in getting inspired about discovering your core values?  Read this book…its a game changer!

BUILD YOUR BRAND

Do you know that you are always interviewing? Whether you are aware of it or not, people are creating a perception and label of you. With our family, friends, at the office, social media…we are constantly forming people’s opinions of us by how we carry ourselves, act, talk, what we post, and how we treat others. This thought can be overwhelming and sound like a lot of pressure, but it doesn’t have to be. It’s time to start thinking about your brand. Your brand should be consistent and cross over to all areas of your life (at home, at work, socially, etc.). But how can it be consistent if you haven’t spent time examining, exploring, and asking yourself vital questions that help you understand what drives your behavior? The cool thing is, if you know who you are and are comfortable in who you are, and know what you want – who gives a %$#@ what people think?

Here lies the question: do people see you the same way you see yourself? Have you set your standards too low for yourself? Are you maximizing your strengths? Do you love to wake up each day and have a zest and zeal to achieve your goals? These are the questions that I hope to help you answer in my next few blog posts. My goal is to help you explore 3 areas that form your brand – I call it your WHAT, HOW, and WHY:

• WHAT: what are your core values?
• HOW: how are you unique – what are your strengths?
• WHY: why do you do what you do – what motivates you?

Here’s the deal, you should not let others create your brand, image, or label for you. We all should take ownership of our brand. We have the freedom to choose our mindset and our actions each day. This unspeakable freedom should not be underestimated. I hope today is the day you take ownership of how others and you see yourself. Every corporation and company has a brand: Nike, Starbucks, Nordstrom, and Apple, are a few of my favorites. When you think of these companies, you instantly have a perception of what they stand for, what they are good at, and why you buy from them. These and other companies have spent hundreds of hours and millions of dollars to formulate their brand. Isn’t it time you do the same?

The most powerful force in the universe is how you see your self – your self perception.  

Have you ever been to the circus?  I have not, but mindset coach Tony Robbins often tells a story about elephants at the circus. When elephants are newly born, their owners tie the elephant up to a stake in the ground. That little elephant tries with all his might to break free from that stake. Unfortunately, that little guy hasn’t developed enough strength to break away. This elephant tries and tries each day to break away to no avail and eventually gives up. As the elephant grows and grows he doesn’t even attempt to pull free, because he has been conditioned to think he’s stuck. He doesn’t understand the power he has, because his perception of his strength has been greatly diminished by conditioning from outside forces.  

Can you relate to this example? Have you been conditioned to see yourself a certain way? Its time to reassess your perception. Only you have the power to change your standards and how you see yourself, as well as others. The old saying, “whether you think you can or cannot, you are right,” fits perfectly here. My next three post will help you explore and think about what makes you, you. I’ll help you examine, what is your true north…what are your core values? Next, I’ll help you identify your strengths and how you can use them to generate personal satisfaction and wealth. Finally, and most importantly, I discuss finding your why – what drives you and motivates you to take action and be your best…is it recognition, money, creating a better position for your family, or something different? 

Check back in…I’m excited to help you build your brand.

COMMIT TO BE FIT

How’s your fitness right now?  We all know the many health benefits of exercising, but there are many obstacles getting in the way of making working out one of our weekly habits:

• Work
• Kid’s schedules
• Lack of time
• Several other commitments
• Don’t know what to do
• Don’t enjoy it 

All of these are real challenges, but we need, have to, and MUST make physical fitness a key piece of our routine to be the best version of ourselves.  According to the Mayo Clinic, let me remind you of a few of the physical benefits:

• Increases energy
• Combats health conditions and diseases (heart disease, blood pressure, lowers cholesterol, etc.)
• Controls weight
• Promotes better sleep
• Puts the spark back into your sex life (where my married peeps at?)
• Prevents injury

The physical advantages of committing a life of fitness are clear, but did you know your mental health will drastically improve as well.  Here are some of the advantages exercise will provide your mental state:

• Improve your mood
• Alleviate anxiety
• Improve self confidence
• Boost “happy chemicals” (endorphins, which decreases depression and increases happiness)
• Tap into creativity & improve brain power
• Improve memory

I believe all these physical and mental benefits to be true, but let me personalize why I work out.  I’m a fairly vain person.  I take pride in my appearance and want to look good.  However, I exercise because its an escape and I really enjoy it.  I once was told by former WSU defensive back coach, Kenny Greene, who looked amazing for his age, “Weight lifting is the fountain of youth.”  I believe this to be true.  If done correctly, mixing in weight bearing exercises with some sort of cardio reduces risk of injury, increases energy, and helps you feel and look younger. 

The physical benefits are clear, but I must say, the mental benefits might be more impactful!  The gym is the number one place where I think.  We all should spend at least 15 minutes per day by ourselves thinking.  When I get to the gym, I have my music playing, my blood is flowing, I’m letting off some steam, and I am getting after it!  This personal time is such a release.  Many of my ideas for work, life, and even this blog come to me while I work out.

Need a work out playlist?  Check out my “gym-flo” mix on Spoitify HERE (note Parental Advisory…these beats may make your booty shake and inspire you to turn into the Incredible Hulk; oh and I like R&B and Hip Hop, so there is some creative usage of the English language).   

Find a way to incorporate physical activity into your weekly calendar.  if you have been lagging behind in this department, be intentional with your time and write it into your schedule, just like you would schedule an important business meeting, or lunch with a friend.

What changes can you make to incorporate physical activity to your daily or weekly routine?  The first year we lived in Lakeland Hills, my longtime friend and neighbor belonged to a gym 9 minutes away from our house….I joined and I think I went 5 times all year.  I opted to work out when I traveled or would just go for a jog occasionally when home.  A year later, I realized I wasn’t incorporating enough weight lifting into my routine.  I switched my gym membership to Tahoma Fitness, which is literally across the street from my house.  It’s $20 more expensive than my old gym, which is why I joined the other one…but that one change drastically increased the frequency I workout.  How I feel and the mental and physical results significantly out-weigh the extra dollars spent.  What’s the one thing you can change?  You should treat your body and mind the same way you should treat your marriage…with commitment, accountability, and make it a priority…oh and it should be fun!  Below are my 5 areas to self-fulfillment – physical fitness being one.

Physical Health & Fitness is one of the 5 areas of self-fulfillment (I’ll talk about the other 4 later)

 If you don’t belong to a gym, come up with a physical activity plan that works for you.  You don’t need to work out for 2 hours to be effective.  Studies have shown that 15 minutes per day, increases mental and physical health.  If you don’t know much about how to exercise, the internet is a great place to start for ideas, or what I recommend is reaching out to a few people you know who workout in a way you think aligns with your needs and pick their brain.  You could always sign up for a personal trainer for a few sessions to help get you started.  Reach out to a friend and go in to this journy of fitness together.  Teamwork makes the dream work!  Having someone to help hold you accountable, might be the x-factor of making fitness a habit.  Trust me, take action…your physical and mental health will be well worth the investment.

Need a quick workout?  Check out my favorite on the go exercise routine…takes only 10 minutes!

DISCOVER

Have you heard of the name Judah Smith?  If you live in the Northwest and are into young adult ministry (ages 18-30ish), love the Seahawks, your favorite golfer is Bubba Watson, and you are a charter member of the Justin Bieber fan club…then you probably know him.  This guy has a lot going on…not only is Judah a New York Times Best Selling author (the book Jesus Is____), he’s also best friends with Bubba, he’s the Biebs pastor and mentor, and Judah JUST added Seattle Seahawk Chaplain to his resume this past fall.  On top of all those cool points, Judah and Chelsea Smith are the pastors at The City Church, which has several locations in the greater Seattle area (their main campus is in Kirkland).

Judah is (in mine and many other’s opinion), the alpha dog, pioneer, and leader for this new wave of young and hip pastors that spread the gospel in non-traditional ways (if you haven’t, look up Carl Lentz, Chad Veach, John Gray, and Rich Wilkerson, Jr.).  These trend setters use fashion, pop culture references, music, sports analogies, hysterical wit, and deep storytelling to convey the message that church isn’t about religion.  It’s about loving yourself and others, but mainly, it’s all about one man – Jesus.

Judah Smith

When we lived in Issaquah, we made the City Church our church home.  Since moving back to the south end (near Lake Tapps), that trek to Kirkland with three kids 3 and under is a little much to handle.  We love calling Puyallup Foursquare our church home now.  However, with the beautiful invention of the internet, we often get caught up on how things are going with Judah and the City Church by watching his sermons on their website (check out his sermons here).  This past weekend, we went on a family walk down our big hill (two miles round trip…it’s a BEAST) and brought along our “church on the go” technique.  With Winnie in the stroller, I propped up my iPhone and synced it up with our Beats Pill (this hill can get a little noisy due to cars driving up and down).  This mobile church method is amazing – try it sometime – you get to get Jiggy with Jesus, while you work your glutes (uhh, what, did I just say that?)!

My walking buddies

During this walk, we listened to Judah discuss the challenges and importance of relationships.  He told a funny story about him and Chelsea early in their marriage.  But during his sermon, he said a phrase that really resonated with me.  He talked about how many fall into the path of comparing; keeping up with the Jones’s; looking for the flaws in others to make us feel better.  During this eloquent talk, he said a phrase that sang to me and caught my ear just like the first time I heard Rihanna sing, “Work, Work, Work, Work, Work” (what she says after that only God knows).  Judah proclaimed,

DISCOVER the beauty in others.

I love this.  So simple, but so true.  I love that he used the word “discover.”  I loved it so much I looked the word up to see all the definitions.  Discover means to:

·         Find (something or someone) unexpectedly or in the course of a search

·         Become aware of (fact or situation)

·         Be the first to observe

·         Perceive the attractions of (an activity or subject) for the first time

·         Be the first to recognize the potential of (someone)

Think about applying all of those definitions when looking at other people.  Use the word “discover” to look at, think about, engage and communicate with others…if you do, it is truly beautiful.  I’ve been guilty of comparing what I have (my physical traits and worldly possessions) versus what others have (good or bad).  Social media is not helping with this epidemic of comparing and envy.  Instagram, Facebook, and Snapchat are vehicles for many to showcase a false reality to make others view them in a certain way.  Conversely, many of us look at these social media apps as a platform to point out the flaws, past judgement, and stack our chips vs. others and say, “HA!  SEE! I’m cooler than so-and-so.”  Can we make this STOP please!

What lens do you view the world in?  What glasses do you wear when looking at other people?  Are you wearing these glasses (glasses that COMPARE):

Or are you wearing these glasses (glasses that CARE):

Are you looking through a lens that compares or cares?  Let’s discover the good, the beauty, and the gifts in others.  Let’s celebrate other people’s success without jealousy.  Let’s continually lift people up with words of encouragement, positivity, and love.  What good does the alternative do?  Being bitter doesn’t make you better, it just makes you sour.  This type of vision is blurred and will throw you off track and set you back from being the best version of you.  On the flip side, no one is made the same or is perfect.  Many gravitate toward people who are most like themselves.  We tend to engage or interact with people who look like us, talk like us, and come from the same background as us.  Imagine what the world would be like if we all DISCOVER the beauty in others and look to find the good instead of the bad..  What if we were intentional with our thoughts and actions to embrace our differences and look for the hidden talents in others.  Breaking down the definition of “Discover,” what if we:

1.       Find something unexpectedly good in someone

2.       Become aware of someone’s passion

3.       Be the first to observe another person’s gift

4.       Perceive (think about) the attractions of someone different than you  

5.       Be the first to recognize the potential in someone…tell them and others of this observation

This approach, I PROMISE is a much healthier way to make you feel better, as well as empower others to be themselves.  This is what Jesus modeled.  When I see others who act, talk, and think the polar opposite of me…I sometimes revert back to some bad habits and start to cast judgment…but I try to remember to remind myself that God loves that person the same as He loves me…I’m no better in His eyes.  He cares for us no matter who we are, not matter where we are from, no matter our circumstance.  God’s vision is 20/20, He looks through a lens that Cares.  He loves us for who we are.  He celebrates our successes.  He loves us at our best and our worst.  I want to be like that for others.

What glasses do you want people to look at you through?  Do you want people to focus on your flaws or your strengths?  Maybe your outlook on life needs a new prescription.  Try this new pair on that I described and see how they fit.  I believe this lens will be much more clear and fulfilling.  Oh by the way, Judah wears glasses…just saying…I’m pretty sure which ones they are too.

DON’T BE PERFECT

“Never perfect, but never settled.” 

I love this quote.  This is from the 2015 reigning NBA MVP, Steph Curry.  This statement rings so true to me and speaks to some of the issues I’ve had to overcome and still work on each day.  I’m a bit of a perfectionist.  Thus, it pains me to say that I’m a little tardy on my 30 Days of Gratitude and Service posts.  I’m about a week and a half behind schedule.  Forgive me.  I need Steph’s quote right now just like the Golden State Warriors need his lights out 3-point shooting.  This quote hits the mark.  Arguable the best player in the NBA, Curry is reminding me to not let perfection get in the way of very good.  Do not let the thought of not being perfect be the reason why I quit or to take a long hiatus from finishing my blog series (or anything in life for that matter).  But he also says to not settle for average, mediocrity, or anything less than your best.  We are not defined by outcomes.  Sometimes I fall prey to that concept.  I’m working on judging myself not solely on wins or losses, but on my process and most importantly, my effort and attitude.  I’m learning that not being perfect is ok.

This is where some people give up though…when things don’t go as planned; the process or the outcome was not the same as the vision that you created when you started on the journey.  You failed, you missed your mark.  It was too hard or too scary.  Let me just say that writing this blog has not been easy.  I mentioned earlier in my post “Habits,” that I get annoyed when people glorify being “busy”…what’s another word for busy?…I’m looking this up right now…ah found it, actually a few words popped up: occupied, involved, hectic, engrossed (my favorite).

So, it takes me, I’ve calculated, about 1.5 hours per post.  Before I ever typed one word for this blog, I had already thought about content and even wrote down notes for this entire series.  However, additional research, proof reading, looking for the perfect picture, and sighting sources – some posts have taken much longer than 1.5 hours.  Though its been hard, it has been a therapeutic process for me to let myself open up and be vulnerable.  I’ve had to work on not worrying about if people aren’t going to like what I write, or if its not worded perfectly, or if each sentence structure is grammatically correct (did I mention my mom is an English teacher?).  I’m still working on this with my writing and how I live life.  I need to just let it go (where’s Elsa when I need her?…oh that’s right, she’s possessed my 2 year old daughter), be me, and not get wrapped up in what I ASSUME OTHER PEOPLE WILL THINK.  Hey, I’m a work in progress here.

Most people are forced to balance multiple commitments at a time…this is nothing new.  But,
 I’ve been juggling my commitment to this blog on top of managing a 5 state territory and traveling a lot (flying to Anchorage, Boise, Spokane, driving to Eugene and back in one day…that was a doozy), One entire week was spent training a new rep.  On top of that, the time I’m at home I want to be present and engaged with my kids and give my wife the QT she deserves.  Let me just say that its been hard…BUT, meaningful and rewarding.

I’ve received amazing messages via text, Facebook, and Instagram.  I’ve connected with people I haven’t talked to in a long time because a post has really helped them.  One of my most rewarding opportunities that has come from this blog was speaking to the Puyallup Foursquare Church Ministry Institute students on Thursday (this is actually the reason, I’m behind on posts, I was preparing for a lecture).  Being in front of over 80 college aged kids and sharing my message of gratitude and service made all the hard work worth it though.  Chatting with a few of these students and staff after my talk and hearing how impactful my message was, made all the extra hours, getting up at 5am some mornings, missing a few shows on TV at night, and skipping a few workouts, all for the sake of a blog and a message worth the hard work.

I need to invest in an iron (T. Wade photo cred).

My encouragement today is that life is not a straight line.  Things don’t always work out perfectly.  Do not put the burden of perfection on you.  The only person to walk this earth perfectly was Jesus.  When things get hard, dig in, have some grit, and keep going.  Keep your sight on your goals and go for it.  My supervisor when I worked in the WSU Athletic Department, John Johnson, used to say, “They said it would be hard, but they said it would be worth it.”

Don’t be perfect, but never be settled.  

I’m committed to finishing my series 30 Days of Gratitude and Service by next Monday (April 3rd).  If you have fallen short on a commitment, its time to get back on the horse and try again.  I opened with a b-ball quote, I’ll end with one too.  Michael Jordan once said, “I don’t fear failure, I fear not trying.”  I love you all.  I’m out.

BELIEVE PART II

Let me share about my experience with the Law of Attraction.  The basic premise of this concept is that thoughts become things.  Meaning, what we think about the most and believe will come true, often time does.  If you believe that good things will happen or bad things will happen, you are usually right.  Our brain is like a magnet.  What we are constantly thinking about, we often times attract in our lives.  God is in control of our lives and always has the final say, but He also gives us the freedom of free will, which includes how we think.

Some people are born with the advantage of consistently being a positive thinker and believing the best is yet to come, but the vast majority of us are not.  For many, including myself, this way of thinking is a learned skill.  When I switched companies almost two years ago, one of my colleagues shared with me the power that the Law of Attraction offers.  For one year, I read a plethora of books and articles on this topic and applied these teachings to my life.  I’ve created my own diagram on how to apply this way of of thinking (see below):

Law of Attraction Steps:

Step 1 – Be Grateful: In order to get into the right frame of mind, focus on all the things you are grateful for.  Those who are constantly bitter, stay bitter because they chose to focus on the wrong things.  Don’t be bitter – be better!  Being grateful is the first step in achieving your goal.

Step 2 – Feel Good: Being grateful helps turn our internal frequency into a positive one, which helps us feel good inside.  Feeling good sends out a frequency (much like a cell phone tower) that attracts more positive things.  Think about past positive experiences, laugh, smile, dance, or do something nice for someone.  Our mind is like a television, when you feel positive and happy emotions inside, you are taking control of what pictures show up on the screen.  You will set your internal television channel into a positive one that creates happy results. 

Step 3 – Set a Goal: This one is simple…what is it that you want to achieve?  First, focus on what you are thankful for, then focus on feeling emotions of joy and happiness.  These two steps will help you determine what it is that you truly want and set your internal frequency to a positive one, which will open yourself up to receive more positive things.  Once you’ve decided what your goal is, write it down somewhere and look at it everyday (If you haven’t, see my post on Goal Setting).

Step 4 – Visualize: Creative visualization is a mental technique that uses the imagination to create success and make dreams and goals come true.  Richard Bach once said, “To bring anything into your life, image that it is already there.”  When you spend time imagining in vivid detail the sights, sounds, and feelings of acting out your goal, the odds of it coming true drastically improve.  This is a technique used by successful athletes and business men and women all over the world.  Check this article out: 8 Successful People Who Use the Power of Visualization  

Step 5 – Believe: Whatever the mind can conceive and BELIEVE, it can achieve.  You must believe with all of your mind, body, and soul that you can achieve your goal.  Belief is the single most important step in turning your dreams into reality.  Anyone who has ever achieved anything of significance, first believed in themselves…YOU CAN DO IT!  BELIEVE IN YOURSELF or no one else will. 

Step 6 – Achieve: When you do these 5 steps, you will achieve your goal.  Remember that success doesn’t come overnight, but takes time and hard work as well.  Many people are looking for a quick fix.  However, when you apply this approach to your life and consistently practice these steps daily, you will see your life truly change.

X Factor: Serving and helping others magnifies what you attract in your life.  Love is the most powerful emotion in the world.  Serving and helping others is a close second.  When you live your life making love and service a main focus, you will attract deeper relationships, success, and true happiness…you will also receive more than you can ever imagine.

This approach helped my wife Kendra and I get our dream house, when it looked like it wasn’t possible.  This technique has helped me reach monthly and yearly goals at work never seen before from a 1 or 2 year sales rep.  My life and job satisfaction have never been better.  I hope you apply these Law of Attraction techniques in your life as well – and make your dreams a reality!

Exercise: Close your eyes, and visualize that you already possess or have achieved your dream.  Imagine what you are wearing, the people around you, where you are, how it feels, and the praise you are receiving for achieving your goal.  Believe with all your might that you can achieve this goal.  I can’t wait for you to apply this way of thinking to your life – and see what you WILL accomplish!

My next post I’ll review the importance of creating strong habits.  I hope you are enjoying and seeing the benefits of this journey 30 Days of Gratitude and Service!

BELIEVE PART I

“Confidence is at the root of so many attractive qualities, a sense of humor, a sense of style, a willingness to be who you are no matter what anyone else might think or say…”
                                                                                    – Wentworth Miller

Andrew Carnegie, the leader in the expansion of the steel industry during the late 1800’s and early 1900’s understood the power of serving others.  He was the Bill Gates and Warren Buffett of his time.  In 1901, Carnegie sold his steel company for $480 million dollars (that’s $370 billion today), yet for nearly the last 20 years of his life, he had given 90% of his income away to charities, foundations, and universities.  He also did something possibly even more philanthropic.  During his booming years of pioneering the expansion of the steel industry, he recruited a young writer named Napoleon Hill to follow him and his wealthy business associates around and observe their behaviors.  Carnegie’s goal was to have Hill write a book to be shared with the world on what traits, habits, and thought processes that were practiced by the wealthiest and most successful people at that time in America.  He wanted to share this knowledge with the world to hopefully help others be the best version of themselves.

After studying these behaviors for 20 years, Hill was able to drill down to one common thread that these successful people possessed.  After capturing these observations, he wrote one of the best selling business books of all time (70 million copies sold world wide) entitled Think and Grow Rich. What was the common trait that these individuals had?…self belief.

Hill introduced a concept he called, “The Law of Success,” which is often called, “The Law of Attraction.”  The Law of Attraction has been written about and shared by many (see The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne or The Magic of Thinking Big, by David Schwartz).  It is the philosophy that what Hill famously said, “Whatever the mind can conceive, and believe, it can achieve.”  People who have unwavering conviction and belief in themselves, usually are the ones sitting on top of the food chain of life.  We all are going to hear “no” and sometimes fall flat on our face.  However, the ones that do not let these setbacks detract them, but continue to have unwavering faith in themselves, ultimately find success.

There are few athletes that exemplify the power of self belief more than Derek Jeter.  One can go on and on about his accomplishments – he’s a 5 time World Champion, clutch performer in the post season, and Yankee record holder in many categories, but there are 2 Jeter stories that I love the most that deal with self belief (gotta represent #2 for The Captain!).

When Jeter was a young boy in Kalamazoo Michigan, he always dreamt of playing shortstop for the Yankees.  He was so passionate and focused on his goal that he pinned a Yankees hat, jersey, and baseball pants up on his wall and looked at them every day for many years.  Despite being from a cold state that didn’t have the best track record of generating first round draft picks, Jeter truly believed and continually visualized himself as a Yankee.  Sure enough, his self confidence and belief paid off when he was selected with the 6th pick in the first round of the 1992 draft.  Jeter innately practiced the power of visualization during his youth.  While no one gave him a shot, he helped make his dream a reality by mentally picturing himself already accomplishing his goal.  

The other story I love about Jeter had nothing to do with an amazing clutch hit or game-saving play at shortstop.  It had to do with failure.  During his first full season in the Minor Leagues, Jeter set a record for the highest number of errors, a whopping 56!  Many scouts and even Yankee coaches considered moving him to the outfield.  But Jeter stuck with it; he didn’t waver in his confidence, he put in the work and got better and better each year, later winning 5 Gold Gloves in the Majors at shortstop.  

These 2 stories about Jeter teach us a few things:

1. Do not limit your dreams or goals…remember: Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve…I also love what Russell Wilson often says, “Why not us?”  I’ll ask a similar question…”Why not you?”  The “haves” versus the “have nots” often comes down to self belief.  You already have everything you need to be successful.  You just need to believe it!
2. The power of visualization is real.  When you consistently visualize yourself already achieving your goal – imagining yourself attaining what it is that you want – what you’re wearing, your exact location, the smells, the sounds around you, etc – you will greatly increase the likelihood of making your dream a reality.  Make this a daily habit of picturing in your mind already achieving your goal and what it will feel like.
3. Do not let failure detour you from your goal.  Learn from your mistakes.  You are not defined by your failure.  All successful people fail…some hundreds of times.  The difference between the ones who succeed vs. the ones who fail is only a matter of getting back up!  Thomas Edison once said, “I haven’t failed, I’ve just found 10,00 ways that won’t work.”

A goal without belief is like a car without an engine.  We can’t make goals and hope they happen.  We must take control of our life and MAKE THEM HAPPEN, through determination and conviction. Check back in as I delve deeper into the Law of Attraction and the power of belief, while sharing a few personal stories to help bring this concept to life.  Happy Friday!!!

CREATING PURPOSE THROUGH GOAL SETTING

Imagine going on a road trip without a map or GPS to guide you to your desired destination.  You would get lost and it would take you much longer to arrive to where you wanted to go (and probably several useless detours, and money wasted on extra gas).  Living life without goals is pretty much the same thing.  People who are not setting goals are living life without a GPS system.  When you set a clear measurable goal, you will create a vision for your life, purpose for your actions, and you will undoubtedly arrive at your desired destination.

There was an eye-popping study from Harvard that looked at the impact of writing down goals (from the book, What They Don’t Teach You in the Harvard Business School, by Mark McCormack).  Researchers followed Harvard MBA graduates 10 years after they graduated, and what they found was remarkable.

The study was simple, upon completing their degree, each graduate was asked this question:

“Have you set clear, written goals with your future and made plans to accomplish them?”

At the beginning of the study, the researchers found:

• 84% had no specific goals at all
• 13% had goals but they were not committed to paper
• 3% had clear, written goals and plans to accomplish them

10 years later they interviewed these graduates again, and the results were staggering:

• The 13% of the students who had goals were earning on average twice as much as the 84% who did not set goals.
•  The 3% who had clear, written goals were earning, 10 times as much as the other 97% put together.

Wow, right?!  Let’s put that into perspective… 97% were making on average $50K per year, and 3% (who were writing down goals) were making $500K per year… that makes things pretty obvious.  When you have a clear focus on what you want to accomplish and think about it everyday, the likelihood that you will achieve it significantly increases.  This approach helps you answer this important question each day: Is what I’m doing right now going to help me achieve my goal?  

This is your internal GPS (Goal Performance System)…similar to what you use when you drive, but this one is for your journey in life.  If the actions and habits you consistently perform daily are not helping you reach your goal, than you probably shouldn’t spend too much time with those tasks.  We all get side tracked every now and then, but those who write down their goals and focus on achieving them each day, are much more likely to stay on the path to success.

The first time I remember writing down my goals was going into my senior football season in high school.  I wrote down a team goal and a personal goal.  My goal was for our team to go to the state playoffs and that I would earn All-State honors.  I wrote these statements in a note card and taped it above my closet, so I’d look at it everyday before I got dressed.  So guess what happened?  Despite having a new coach, and losing the majority of our starters from the year before, we made it to the State Quarterfinals and I earned multiple All-State honors from several news outlets including the Seattle Times and Tacoma News Tribune.  It’s one thing to have a goal, but you really have to believe that you can achieve it that makes it powerful.  I remember visualizing our team playing in the state playoffs, and also seeing my name in the paper on the All-State Team often throughout that season.  I was so pumped when it actually happened. 

I’ve seen my sales career greatly benefit from writing down my goals.  For the past 2 years (since I changed companies), I have really made this aspect of my business planning a big deal.  Each year, I write down how much money I want to make, what place in the rankings I want to finish, and how many customer orders I want to receive (monthly and for the year).  This formula has put me up on stage at our last two National Sales Meetings including a Rookie of the Year Award in 2014  and a Top Performer Award in 2015.  I’ve made more income than I’ve ever made in my life and I truly feel like my lens and perspective on what I need to accomplish each day is more clear then ever.

We can apply goal setting in our lives in more areas than just work or athletics…our marriage/relationships, parenting, our friendships, volunteering, and our hobbies all could benefit from writing down goals and looking at them each day.  So my challenge for you today during this 30 Days of Gratitude and Service is to write down 3 goals:

• Monthly goal
• Year goal
• A long term goal (at least 3-10 years out)

Write it down somewhere that you can look at it everyday.  This vision and road map will give you the direction and focus you need to be the best version of yourself and accomplish your dreams.  Good luck…I know you can do it!!!

TIP: Use this SMART format when writing down your goals.  Check back in for my next post on the power that belief and visualization has on making your goals a reality!

FEAR

What are you afraid of that is holding you back? What are you avoiding? Let’s face it, we all have fears – they’re natural & normal. Even the most successful people in their respective professions feel moments of anxiety and stress. Jerry Rice, the greatest wide receiver of all time, said that he felt fear before every football game. Grammy winner and multi-platinum selling artist, Adele, suffers from stage fright before every single performance. We all have moments of fear; the difference is who has the courage to face it?

For many, fear is debilitating, crippling, and paralyzing.  Depression and anxiety are draining the life out of millions of people each day. If we change our mindset and look at fear and stress from a different perspective, maybe we can learn to control some of our anxieties.

The emotion of fear is a needed response in times of crisis and danger.  The fight or flight switch in our brain keeps us out of trouble when something dangerous comes our way.  We become more alert, our heart beat increases, more oxygen is pumped through our veins, and adrenaline kicks in. These body responses are great if you are trying to avoid being hit by a car, but they can be to our demise when our physical safety IS NOT in danger.  Our mind can be our biggest strength, but also our biggest enemy.  We create moments of crisis in our minds that bring out these fight or flight emotions to avoid embarrassment and failure.  But if we can recognize that fear is often times a fake and a liar, then we can start to overcome these life-sucking thoughts and feelings.   

Fear is darkness.  In order to defeat darkness, we must shed light on our fears.  How do we let light conquer dark?  TELL SOMEONE!  Have the courage to be vulnerable and share with someone your fear.  Trust me, you are not alone.  Every single person on this planet deals with some form of anxiety, fear, and even depression at some point in their life.  No one is perfect.  Stop living your life thinking that you have to be perfect…you don’t.  We all have our own form of baggage.  Do not fear judgement.  Know that you are made uniquely special and that you are loved by more people than you probably even know.

Let me shed light on my darkness, my fear.  6th grade was the year that I recognized that I had a slight stutter or stammer.  It was something small that I let grow into something big – as if when I became self-aware, I let my mind make it a bigger deal than it was.  Many people might have had no idea that I worried about this, but those in my inner circle noticed.  It got to a point my sophomore year in high school, that I was so afraid of messing up on a word, that I avoided reading out loud in class at all costs.  That same year I had a semester of Speech class, where we were graded on our public speaking.  The night before each speech, I felt like Jesus the night before he was crucified, praying, “God, please take this cup from me,” where he was sweating blood out of his forehead. I would get through my speeches, but it was painful, I’d avoid certain words, and I often times stumbled over myself.  It was embarrassing and I felt ashamed.  I didn’t talk to anyone about it; I just wore that burden and kept it all inside.  I didn’t seek help or let anyone know what I was going through…have you ever been through something similar, where you avoided telling someone you were hurting?

So, most of my adolescent and young adult life my biggest fear was public speaking.  I was comfortable talking to others one on one, but it would be a cold day in hell before I agreed to speak in front of a crowd. It wasn’t until one fateful day at the Denver airport about to fly home from my uncle’s wedding when my parents sat me down (I was 26 at the time), and said, “Collin, we think you could benefit from speech therapy.”  I thought to myself, “Oh my God, is it that bad?”  I felt embarrassed and ashamed…but why?  Isn’t that what parents and other loved ones in our lives are for? I reluctantly enrolled in speech therapy.  It was uncomfortable.  It was humbling.  It was scary.  But it was the best thing I ever did.  After going to speech therapy once a week for 3 months, I had made drastic improvements in my speech, which boosted my confidence and shook down my anxieties, though I wasn’t completely done.

They say “Our greatest promise lies within our greatest pain.”  I continued to face my fear and starting going to Toastmasters (a club for people who practice public speaking in a group) weekly and was speaking with greater ease and more confidence each time.  Through a lot of practice and repetition, I became more and more confident and was loving my new found comfort speaking in formal situations. I faced my dragon and felt joy and rest in my soul.

Today, I seek out opportunities to speak in front of large groups.  In my current medical device sales position, I’m also a trainer for the westcoast.  If you would have told me 10 years ago, that I’d be presenting our new sales strategy to the entire sales force at a national sales meeting, I’d say no way!  I’ve accepted the fact that I do not have to be perfect to be effective.  If I mess up, people will not view me as a failure, but as human.  I have learned that the more I avoid speaking situations, the bigger hole I dig for myself and my confidence begins to sink.  However, the more I practice and create opportunities to present, the better I become. 

Remember, our greatest promise lies within our greatest pain…if you do what you fear the most, there is nothing you cannot do.  I find my deepest satisfaction and happiness when I do what I used to fear the most – speaking in public.  I still feel a few nerves and my heart beats fast like it used to before I present, but I’ve learned to speak positive thoughts to myself and not avoid, but ATTACK what I once feared the most.

So let me ask again, what do you fear?  What is holding you back from being the best version of yourself?  My challenge today is that you tell someone what is causing you anxiety and fear.  Shed light on your darkness.  You are not alone.  You have people who love you and are here to help you.  Seek professional help if needed.  TALK TO SOMEONE!  Create a plan to overcome your fear.  Do not sit.  Take action and control of your life, do not let fear control you.

We discussed in earlier posts about the power of gratitude and service.  Facing your fears is the next step to becoming the best version of you.  Check back later this week as I discuss the tools needed to conquer fear – Positive thinking and practicing positive self-talk.  Have a blessed day…in the end, know that you are made perfectly just the way you are and that God loves you!  You can do this!

30 DAYS OF GRATITUDE & SERVICE

30 Days of Gratitude & Service is a 30-day series where we will discover how to add passion &  purpose to your daily life. I truly believe that every day is an opportunity for growth and I want you to learn to be the best version of yourself. My goal is for you to wake up every morning believing and knowing that today is going to exceed every expectation, no matter what is thrown your way.

God laid this project on my heart some time ago, and I have without a doubt been convicted and challenged to my core throughout this process, but I can say with 100% certainty that this is a divine appointment and a word from God. I know that this will change your life and I am truly excited to watch it unfold. I believe in it’s ability and HIS ability to change you through this.

Over the next 30 days, we’re going to discuss everything from Goal Setting to Mentorship to Love & to Fear. I hope that you break down barriers and make a change, small or big, in your life and in the other lives around you. Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change. 

Come back tomorrow to kick things off! Happy Monday! 

EVERYTHING CHANGED

I have always been a spiritual person.  As a family growing up, we went to church most Sundays…barring an athletic game here or there.  From day one, I was brought up in a Christian family going to People’s Christian Church (now called Champion’s Centre) in Tacoma and later All-Saint’s Catholic Church in Puyallup.  I always have had a personal relationship with Jesus, but still felt a void I couldn’t explain. I always seeked out God through prayer and being in his house, yet I didn’t feel at home. 

That all changed in 2007, when I moved back to Puyallup for a job in pharmaceutical sales.  I ran into one of my high school football teammates who was working at a church in town called Puyallup Foursquare.  He told me to come and check it out.  After going for a few weeks and listening to the pastor, Roger Archer (a former college athlete and a far cry from the traditional pastor that we all expect), I felt something different. He used pop culture references, sports analogies, and made church a place that I could relate to, a place that I craved.  I started volunteering and joining small groups and really saw my “void” begin to close.

For the first time in my life I felt spiritually right.  I was reading my Bible, praying more than ever, and making amazing friends within my church. BUT, I still had yet to conquer my inner battles of self-doubt and insecurities. My job at the time was slowly killing my spirit – I had hit my lowest point in my career (despite being a step up in the company). It was the wrong fit for me,  I wasn’t sleeping at night and my physical wellness suffered in turn. I was on blood pressure medicine to manage the stress I was enduring. I reached a breaking point, where I knew I needed to get out.  I needed to jump.  God’s timing is all-knowing and perfect – he threw me a lifeline…in the form of a book that changed my life.  My manager gifted me a book to start the new year – Positive Intelligence, by Shirzad Chamine. 

We all suffer with bouts of self-doubt and occasional negative thinking.  There is always two sides in our brain duking it out fighting over “yes I can’ or “no I can’t” and I unfortunately was often times on the losing end of this internal war whether in my athletic or professional career.  This book by Chamine helped me identify that we all have mental saboteurs in our brain and if we can identify that this internal judge is a liar, a fraud, and a fake, we can stay focused on positive thoughts and keep our minds honed in on the task at hand and concentrate on our strengths.

This book single handedly give me the confidence and the tools to nail my interview with a fortune 500 medical device company, and jumpstarted a 2 year period of enlightenment and self-discovery.  Upon joining this company I was assigned a trainer and mentor named Frankie Pretzel (is that not the coolest name you ever heard?).  Frankie was a seasoned veteran who had won multiple awards and was very successful.  Sometimes I feel God puts people in our lives at the exact right place and time.  Frankie was an optimist.  He knew the power of positive thinking and the affect it has on our lives.  He explained to me a concept I had never been exposed to: the Law of Attraction.  Basically, the Law of Attraction is a concept that is summed up as simple as this:thoughts become things.  Meaning what we think about the most and visualize for ourself is usually manifested somehow someway whether negative or positive.  Frankie gave me a long list of books to read and over the course of one year I couldn’t get enough. I craved these ideas, and the change was revitalizing.

This fresh start and exposure to new ideas, thoughts, and concepts that all dealt with faith, generosity, gratitude, self-belief, and visualization helped me create momentum on what I was searching for while I was on that memorable morning run in Los Angeles with my dad when I was lost at 24.  For one year, I read and listened to more books than I probably have in my entire life.  With each book, my confidence, self-acceptance, and vision of what I needed to do to feel happy and have success was more clear. During this time of discovery I had finally found my professional lane and was flourishing at work and loving every minute of it.  I’m pumped to share with you what I’ve learned along the way – I know it will change your life like it has mine.

Below are some of the favorite books that I read.  I encourage you to be a lifelong learner and seek knowledge and wisdom from books.  There is a whole new world full of enlightenment and discovery.  What are you doing to better yourself?  I challenge you to read a book or download an audiobook to your phone (listen to it in your car or while working out).  Investing in your development and knowledge is the best investment you can make!

• Positive Intelligence, by Shirzad Chamine
• Love Does, by Bob Goff
• David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants, by Malcolm Gladwell
• The Go-Giver, by Bob Burg and John David Mann
• The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne
• Jesus Is___, by Judah Smith

Are you stuck in a rut?  Sometimes a change of scenery can do you wonders.  Have the courage to step outside your comfort zone and create a fresh start for yourself.  Whether you are where you need to be, but want to improve.  Or you feel like you are running in sand and just churning your wheels, I hope that these books may inspire you to make the change in yourself you’ve always wanted.